Letter 9121: I have the epistle of your Holiness, written with the pen of charity alone. For what the tongue transferred to the paper had got its tincture from the heart. Good and wise men were present when it was read, and at once their bowels were stirred with emotion.

Gregory to Leander, Bishop of Spain. I have received Your Holiness's letter -- written, I can say, with the pen of charity alone. What your tongue transferred to the page had been dyed in the colors of the heart. Good and wise men were present when it was read aloud, and at once their deepest feelings were stirred. Each one began to embrace you in his heart with the hand of love, for in that letter the sweetness of your character was not merely heard -- it was seen. Everyone was kindled, everyone marveled, and the very fire it lit in the listeners revealed the ardor that had burned in the speaker. For unless torches are themselves alight, they will not kindle others. We could see, then, how great a charity blazed in your mind, since it so powerfully kindled the same in others. As for my life -- your letter speaks of it as worthy of imitation by all. But may the thing that is not as it is said to be become so because it has been said, so that the one who is not accustomed to lying will not have lied. In reply, I will say only the brief words of a certain good woman: "Call me not Naomi" -- that is, fair -- "but call me Mara, for I am full of bitterness" (Ruth 1:20). For indeed, good man, I am not today the man you knew. I confess that in advancing outwardly I have fallen far inwardly, and I fear I belong to the number of those about whom it is written: "You cast them down while they were lifted up" (Psalm 73:18). For the one who is cast down while being lifted up is the one who advances in honors while declining in character. Following the ways of my Lord, I had resolved to be the scorn of men and the outcast of the people, and to run the course described by the Psalmist: "He has disposed the ascents in his heart, in the valley of tears" (Psalm 84:6) -- meaning that I should ascend inwardly all the more truly the more I descended outwardly in humility.

Book IX, Letter 121 To Leander, Bishop of Hispalis (Seville). Gregory to Leander, Bishop of Spain. I have the epistle of your Holiness, written with the pen of charity alone. For what the tongue transferred to the paper had got its tincture from the heart. Good and wise men were present when it was read, and at once their bowels were stirred with emotion. Everyone began to seize you in his heart with the hand of love, for that in that epistle the sweetness of your disposition was not to be heard, but seen. All severally were inflamed, and all admired, and the very fire of the hearers showed what had been the ardour of the speaker. For, unless torches burn themselves, they will not kindle others. We saw, then, with how great charity your mind was aflame, seeing that it so kindled others also. Your life indeed, which I always remember with great reverence, they did not know; but the loftiness of your heart was manifest to them from the lowliness of your language. As to my life, this your epistle speaks of it as worthy of imitation by all: but may that which is not as it is said to be become so because it is said to be so, lest one should lie who is not wont to lie. In reply to this, however, I speak shortly the words of a certain good woman, Call me not Noemi, that is, fair; but call me Mara, for I am full of bitterness Ruth 1:20. For indeed, good man, I am not today the man you knew. For I confess that in advancing outwardly I have fallen much inwardly, and I fear that I am of the number of those of whom it is written, You cast them down while they were lifted up Psalm 72:18 . For he is cast down when he is lifted up who advances in honours, and falls in manners. For I, following the ways of my Head, had determined to be the scorn of men and the outcast of the people, and to run in the lot of him of whom again it is said by the Psalmist, The ascents in his heart he has disposed in the valley of tears Psalm 83:7 ; that is, that I should ascend inwardly all the more truly as I lay outwardly the more humbly in the valley of tears. But now burdensome honour much depresses me, innumerable cares din me, and, when my mind collects itself for God, they cleave it with their assaults as if with a kind of swords. My heart has no rest. It lies prostrate in the lowest place, depressed by the weight of its cogitation. Either very rarely or not at all does the wing of contemplation raise it aloft. My sluggish soul is torpid, and, with temporal cares barking round it, already almost reduced to stupor, is forced now to deal with earthly things, and now even to dispense things that are carnal; nay sometimes, by force of disgust, is compelled to dispose of some things with accompanying guilt. Why should I say more? Overcome by its own weight, it sweats blood. For, unless sin were reckoned under the name of blood, the Psalmist would not say, Deliver me from blood guiltiness Psalm 50:16 . But, when we add sin to sins, we fulfil this also which is said by another prophet, Blood has touched blood Hosea 4:2 For blood is said to touch blood when sin is joined to sin, so as to multiply the load of iniquity. But in the midst of all this I implore you by Almighty God to hold me who am fallen into the billows of perturbation with the hand of your prayer. For I sailed as it were with a prosperous breeze when I led a tranquil life in a monastery: but a storm, rising suddenly with gusty surges, caught me in its commotion, and I lost the prosperity of my voyage; for in loss of rest I suffered shipwreck. Lo, now I am tossed in the waves, and I seek for the plank of your intercession, that, not being counted worthy to reach port rich with my ship entire, I may at least after losses be brought to shore by the aid of a plank. Your Holiness writes of being afflicted with the pains of gout, by continual suffering from which I too am grievously worn down. But comfort will be readily at hand, if amid the scourges under which we suffer we recall to mind whatever faults we have committed; and then we shall see that they are not scourges, but gifts, if by pain of the flesh we purge the sins which we did for delight of the flesh. Furthermore we have sent you, with the blessing of the blessed Peter, Prince of the Apostles, a pallium, to be used only in celebration of Mass. In sending it to you I ought to admonish you much as to how you ought to live: but I suppress speech, since in your manner of life you anticipate my words. May Almighty God keep you under His protection, and bring you to the rewards of the heavenly country with multiplied fruits of souls. As to me, with what amount of business and with what weakness I am weighed down this short letter bears witness, in which I say little to one whom I greatly love.